Roméo et Juliette - A Night of Horrorific Comedy in Taipei

Good thing my friend and I only paid NT1,500 (€34) to see this awful production of Roméo et Juliette. A friend who's seen it on Friday told us that it was worse than she'd expected, especially the fact that the actress playing Juliette (Joy Esther) couldn't sing well at all. I warned my friend who took the train an hour away from Taipei just to see this spectacle (what a spectacle it was!) and we both went in expecting the worst. We managed to get 9th row seats since the Sun Yat-Sen Memorial Hall Theatre was big and guess what, ticket sales only reached 2/3 of the overall capacity.

The show began with a bang. Yes, the sound system located right in front of us simply couldn't handle the heavier sounding music. Then, we were set for a night of complaints. Everything went by so fast but we still wished that it could've ended faster, so that we didn't have to suffer that much. When Juliette came out to perform her first number (Un Jour), she couldn't reach the higher pitch part and nothing came out for a brief 5 seconds. Then, we got the friend of Roméo, Mercutio. The actor who played him had long frizzy hair and for very odd reasons, sang like Michael Jackson, moved like Michael Jackson and looked a bit like as if he were kissed by a toad.

I got bored with the actors and started looking more closely at the set. Poorly painted and it looked as if the tower where Juliette's bedroom was located (a bit like a fairytale that we all know...Rapunzel?) was going to fall over anytime. I tried to focus on the show again, except now it was a dance number and bare-chested male dancers were dancing. Normally dancers have a very good physique; well, at least what I can recall from the last couple of musicals I saw elsewhere. Not this group. I accidentally saw one dancer whose belly was bouncing up and down, as well as sideways. That wans't very sweet for my eyes. If this guy weren't dancing, I'd call him a "bon vivant" but he simply ruined the whole image of dancers. My friend sitting beside me didn't notice him. I guess he was paying attention to the nearly falling tower and the not-so-good-looking-and-emotionless-Romeo. Indeed, speaking of which, I stopped paying to Damien Sargue's Roméo (he is actually the original Roméo in Paris) because I saw his underwear badly tugged in in his pants and it ruined everything for me. The dresser should have made sure that he was dressed properly and plus, it wasn't a modern setting (unlike the Hungarian production), I just couldn't accept the fact that Romeo was wearing a Calvin.

Time for Juliette to sing again. And again. And again. My friend whispered to me that he wanted to kill this Juliette right before the end of Act I. I was all for it. The woman couldn't sing! She still couldn't reach high-pitch notes and she sounded like she'd smoked too many packs before she went on stage. And the sad fact is, she does smoke! We saw her outside the theatre chatting with the creator of the show with ciggies and cokes.

End of Act I. Curtain lowered and my friend and I looked at each other, determined not to do anything stupid like kicking that woman's ass because she couldn't sing! We complained instead. For about 15 minutes we ranted about everything on the musical. There was no one positive note on the show. We felt sorry for people who have paid more than we did to come to see this. We also agreed that there was no chemistry between the actor and the actress. Actually, it was an emotionless Roméo et Juliette.

Then, curtain raised for Act II. She still couldn't reach high note and Michael Jackson double finally off the stage (Youpi!). Now, when Mercutio died, Roméo was supposed to be sad and angry, so much so that he took the dagger to kill Tybalt. I couldn't recall any sadness nor anger. I just heard yelling and saw actors danced about the stage. That was it. They were supposed to be good friends, weren't they? One interesting note on the fight scene between Mercutio and Tybalt. New words were added to the number and was Mercutio gay? Because when he commented on how Tybalt would never sleep with Juliette, Tybalt replied by saying something like how many long-haired guys he slept with. What was that? I thought I made an error because I just listened, I didn't look at the subtitles (it was in French with Chinese subtitles). But my friend confirmed it. He did make that remark.

The show was still going too slow for us. The final suicide scene came. Juliette still had that broken voice, even when she yelled out "Réponds-moi" to Roméo. She wasn't even singing for crying outloud. We simply couldn't wait for Juliette to put the dagger into herself. We were very glad to help her out if we could get on stage. Oh, peace at last. They laid there and it was the end. Almost. We noticed that Frère Laurent (the priest) was dressed in a rather strange way. My friend said he looked like a gigolo (he looked like an old roommate of mine) with that heavy leather coat that opens up from the waist up. He wore what I'd call leggings (tight pants) from the waist down. It was a bit of a provocative costume if one's into SM. But this actor tried pretty hard so we'd give him so credits.

Finally done. We wanted to leave right away but there was the encore performance of the two most popular songs ("Aimer" and "Les Rois du monde" which were released as singles and were also huge in France several years ago. I can recall when the show just came out in France, it was pretty sensational). Then, all these crazy girls just ran in front of the stage to take photos of the actors and shook hands with them (see attached photos). I don't mind seeing that except that all these girls were screaming in a high-pitch (that Juliette couldn't do!)

Time to get out and complain more.

I had to apologize to my friend to invite him to come see this crap. Really sorry about dragging you to Taipei and wasted your Saturday night to listen to some woman who couldn't sing and all the jazz...